End of Play

Friends:

As must be obvious to anyone who still passes by here anymore, I have proven to be an unreliable blogger. I started QFC in late 2007, flush with the excitement of a new adventure about to begin in New York (to say nothing of my then-new MacBook which I couldn’t keep my hands off of). This runs in our household, apparently – Ultimate Concern has proven likewise erratic in his posting as well, though I hope he can redouble his efforts while in the UK this summer.

As I’ve said on these pages before, to anyone reading, I have been reconsidering the wisdom of making this blog – in name if not in content – so focused on religious matters. If I ever start another one, I want it to be broader in scope than what is suggested by “Queer for Christ.” It was just such a damn cool URL I couldn’t resist it. But it is time for someone else to have it now.

Dedicated readers (all 4 or you) also know that I’ve been working on writing a play for the past few years (it’s called The Jesus Project) and last night I heard it read by actors for the first time. It was an amazing and focusing experience, one that I will never, ever forget. And though it was exhausting and sometimes frightening, I want to do it again and again – which means, I guess, that I want to devote my time and energies into becoming a playwright. Not that I think I am ready for prime time just yet – far from it. I learned as much about my weaknesses as I did my strengths, sitting at that table last night, listening to some gifted actors breathe some life into the words I had written.

So I have a lot of work to do. And a lot to learn. Given my limited attention span and brain capacity, that doesn’t leave much room for blogging right now. I want to keep working on The Jesus Project, maybe try to organize a workshop here in NYC. Also there are other ideas bouncing in my head that I want to begin working on, and a few auditions I’d like to go to. I also have a wonderful day job raising money for Outreach at St. Luke in the Fields.

dsc00046I expect to have a personal website up and running soon, to help me stay in touch with friends and also to promote my work as a writer, actor and consultant. That URL will probably be terrymilner.com. Clever, no? Also I am on FaceBook (for now, anyway, I am always flirting with unplugging from it) so you can find me there too.

So WQFC is signing off, friends. I want to say a special word of thanks to other bloggers like Tobias the Brilliant, Luiz the Young, and especially Grandmere Mimi the Young-at-Heart, with whom I have enjoyed a warm correspondence and one very special visit. (Maroon’s closed down, Mimi!) And of course to MadPriest, who has always been so encouraging and supportive. Ahem. I have enjoyed your writing and your friendship immensely, everyone.

And finally I owe a huge debt to my best editor and best friend, Gabriel. He keeps me writing, and reading, and thinking. This has been fun!

It is Finished

For anyone who may still be checking in, I am happy to tell you all that the play I’ve been working on for three years (!) is finally complete, or at least ready for the next stage of development. On April 19, I have six real live actors coming over to do a table reading, which will tell me how much more work it needs before I start submitting it to agents and theatres. This is scary scary, since it means other people are actually starting to look at this thing that has been so private and personal to me for so long. But that was the point, no?

I am actually considering posting it on this blog, a scene at a time, for your comments and consideration. Not sure whether it would be of interest to you all, or what might be gained. A play is not for reading, it’s for performing, so what to do?

Anyone still reading, I invite your comments!

Best Picture of the Day

Do NOT mess with this little girl's MAHATMA! She is a bad ass!

Do NOT mess with this little girl's MAHATMA! She is a bad ass!

Happy Valentine’s Day

Just a quick note to send love and appreciation to all who happen by. Now I’m off to help the hubby buy ingredients for a delicious romantic dinner. And this time, he’s cooking! Glory and Trumpets!!

Radical Hospitality: Rick Warren at the Presidential Inauguration

I want to say up front that I would have preferred the President Elect, whom I supported, worked for and contributed to, had invited someone who shares my theology and social-political views to give the invocation at his inauguration. Nonetheless, whether invoked by Rick Warren or Katharine Jefferts Schori, God will be present on Inauguration Day. And as Christians, therefore, we also believe Christ will be on the podium as well, maybe sitting beside George Bush on the front row, looking on. He’ll be there no matter who articulates the prayer that invites him.

Rick Warren causes all of us pain, in some very real ways. How then, as Christ-followers, are we to feel when we see him on that stage? Is this a cynical ploy to court right-wing evangelicals? Is Barack that calculating? Is this realpolitik as usual? Or is it rather something more inspired, more Christian, than anything the rest of us could ask for or imagine?

I spent much of the 1990′s as a campaign organizer and also a volunteer field representative for the Human Rights Campaign in a conservative southern state. It was there that I was introduced to single-issue identity politics. I also buried several close friends and cared for others during the height of the AIDS epidemic. I marched, boycotted, participated in civil disobediences, came close to being arrested with Urvashi Vaid, and am proud of everything I did. It was necessary then to speak out and act against unjust policies, and it still is.
Continue reading

Change

Having a lot of thoughts lately about what this blog is for, and what I want it to be. I fell in love with the URL when I found out it was available and jumped on it, but am thinking it might make a nice gift to some worthy young person with more content discipline than I possess.

As you can see from the most recent post, my thoughts and energies are more and more turning toward my work as an actor and writer, and that work is not really well described by the words “Queer for Christ,” even though they still describe me pretty well. And it is fun and provocative, sure, but is it reaching people who might be looking for reasoned discourse on matters of faith and sexuality, or is it a turn-off to those folks?

I’m just thinking out loud, here. Comment if you like.

David Mamet, Or: How I Learned to Stop Pretending and Love Rush Limbaugh

In a way, I am a student of David Mamet.

When I returned to New York last year and began dusting off the cobwebs of my theatrical career, my best instincts told me to get back into training before I started looking for work. It had been years – decades, in fact – since I had been to an acting class, and the training I had was mostly squishy and vague. So I was determined to send myself to boot camp – to find a training program that would help me become a more disciplined, more intentional, more muscular artist.

Because of its reputation, name recognition, and geographic convenience (it being five blocks from where we live), I gravitated to the Atlantic Theatre Company’s Acting School, which purports to teach the acting technique developed by founders David Mamet and William H. Macy. Muscular artists, indeed. At its core, the technique exhorts actors to stop trying to pretend to be people (characters) they are not, but rather to walk onstage or in front of the camera with no other intention than to accomplish the objectives of the character in the story, using the words of the playwright. No displays of false emotion. Less “acting,” more “action,” with the belief that what an audience really wants when they pay their money is the experience of watching the actor’s dynamic striving to accomplish something important, something difficult. And in so doing, the audience and the artists collaborate in accomplishing the most heroic goal of all: to contribute to the increase of human understanding.

The classes were agonizing the way your first few trips to the gym after years of sloth can be agonizing. One of my teachers there last fall, Jordan Lage, fairly personified the stoic, no-nonsense approach to acting and dramaturgy Mamet preaches, and a tougher drill sergeant you could not find in a New York acting studio. Meaner, less intelligent, and less talented, maybe, but none tougher. And the first chance I had to put these new techniques to the test in an audition situation, I got the part. Boom. Wow. Thanks, Mr. Mamet. And thank you, Jordan and Tamara.

When you take class at Atlantic, you are invited to read some of the essays on drama, acting and philosophy Mamet has authored over the years, and I ate most of it up with a spoon. I loved what he said in True and False, for example, about the pretension and disingenuousness of many theatre academics. I knew from experience the terrible results of hack drama teachers (and directors) inflicting their half-baked pseudo-psychological oversimplifications of Stanislavsky, or Strasberg, or you-name-who, on fragile and impressionable young hearts and minds. I shared his disdain for these people.

I had just begun reading his Three Uses of the Knife when Mamet published his recent essay in the Village Voice, titled “Why I Am No Longer a ‘Brain-Dead Liberal.’” I became aware of the piece only after reading Charles Isherwood’s piece in last Sunday’s New York Times, awarding Mamet’s current Broadway offering, November, the title of “Most Irritating Play of the Season.” In his column, Brantley could not resist a reference to Mamet’s previous piece in the Voice, in which (he said) Mamet had come out as a conservative.

When I read the title of the piece, my first reaction was to ask whether Mamet ever a “brain dead liberal?” I had never thought so, and I’ve read a lot of his essays and plays, and seen many interviews with him as well. He always seemed to be too intellectually rigorous and logical a thinker to be a brain-dead anything. I also found him to be a person of some faith, and was happy to hear he walked a spiritual path, something I could relate to in his life. It also gave some human warmth to his otherwise cold, logical, utterly unsentimental Spockish affect (is it just me, or does he look more like Leonard Nimoy with every photograph?). And as he says himself in the Voice, he never followed liberal orthodoxy or wrote about people who did.

I agree with one point Mamet makes in his essay, or at least one I think he makes, namely that most ideology is really prejudice masquerading as reason. To be a reactionary ideologue, no matter what your stripe, is to be brain-dead indeed – and there are plenty of those around.

A great thesis, but unfortunately almost no synthesis ever followed. The promise of an “election season essay” worthy of David Mamet went utterly unfulfilled, and I am sorely disappointed. What we got instead sounded irritatingly like a caller on a right-wing talk show complaining about his property being rezoned, his taxes raised and his money being confiscated by a meddling and intrusive government. Mamet could have made a groundbreaking argument for a kind of postmodern, post-conservative libertarianism I suspect he really espouses, but instead he just sounds like a guy who always pretended to be a liberal because all his intellectual, artistic friends were, but who simply got too tired of thinking too hard and gave up (or, in the words of a close friend of mine, he simply accumulated enough “fuck-you money” that he no longer needs to care). After all, it’s a lot easier to give in to the greed and self-interest Mamet has now embraced as natural and “human” than to continue to work for something better. Some of us think of that effort as building the dominion of a loving and just God on Earth, but regardless of how you look at it, the arc of the moral universe is long, and it is our duty as human beings to traverse it as best we can, rather than giving up and grabbing every individual advantage in the process.

Mamet say he is no longer a liberal because he has given up on the notion that human beings are basically good at heart. What a bizarre statement. Since when did anyone become a liberal or a progressive (or what have you) because they thought that? Speaking for myself, I believe in teaching and preaching a social gospel, and electing a progressive, active, enlightened government precisely because I know human beings are prone to greed, lust for power, and all the other evils Mamet seems to think a good conservative should embrace as part of the natural order.

Mamet also attacks liberals for being anti-military and anti-corporations. It is truly a brain-dead liberal that sees things in such absolutes, I will concede. But Mamet is equally brain-dead in his critique, since most “liberals” I know would never advocate dismantling the military or dissolving all corporations. It is the power that these institutions have amassed in this country that we progressives work to curtail. Not the use of military power to bring about lasting peace (as in Central Europe, for example) nor the promotion of healthy economic competition and fair dealing (as shown by the long-term peace and prosperity we enjoyed when Democrats held the White House). To say that you are no longer a liberal because you’ve learned to love the military and the corporation is to deny a self-evident truth: that these institutions must be carefully monitored, managed and regulated because history tells us they tend toward absolute power, oligarchy, feudalism and fascism – products of the greed and self-interest that is, yes, unfortunately part of our broken humanity.

My friend Les is fond of saying that the difference between a liberal and a progressive is that a liberal sits in his living room grieving for an imperfect world, while a progressive goes out and tries to change it. Some see this dichotomy writ large in the current Democratic Presidential primary. Whatever the case, Mamet doesn’t seem to have ever been either one, really. He claims to have had a change of mind, but goes on to admit that anyone who has read his plays probably knows he was pretending all along.

I applaud anyone who points out the shortcomings of the self-righteous and the hypocritical, especially their own, and in his critique of liberalism Mamet does make some valid points. But when he includes a reference to his nickname for National Public Radio (“National Palestinian Radio”), he betrays not a philosophy, but a prejudice. Not a change of mind, but an admission of guilt.

And that is very disappointing.

Church in Nigeria Says No Link to Violence, but…

So the Church of Nigeria changed the “no comment” of Archbishop Akinola (regarding his alleged association with the perpetrators of anti-Muslim retributive violence) to a denial; he now says he had nothing to do with the massacre of Muslims in 2004.

Well, I actually have no idea if he did or not. But if not, what in the name of David Livingstone does THIS statement by Akinola mean:

“I’m not out to combat anybody. I’m only doing what the Holy Spirit tells me to do. I’m living my faith, practicing and preaching that Jesus Christ is the one and only way to God, and they respect me for it. They know where we stand. I’ve said before: let no Muslim think they have the monopoly on violence.”

Now I understand the Nigerian Church’s moral position so much better! It seems to go like this: “Christianity has a monopoly on the truth. If you are not a Christian you are going to hell. Muslims say the same thing about their faith, so we both understand and respect each another’s desire to kill one another. You Northerners just don’t get it.”

It gets better. Akinola’s spokesman later said that Akinola’s reference to violence quoted above involved a time in 2006 “when Nigerian Christians were being slaughtered because of some cartoons published in Denmark.”

“The Western press should learn from the Danish cartoons saga that articles they publish, whatever the motive might be, can be responsible for the death of many innocent lives hundred of miles away,” he said in conclusion.

So now, not only does Akinola bear no responsibility for the violence in 2004, apparently no one else in Nigeria is, either! It’s the Danes! Now I get it.

Listen, I realize it’s easy for me to write about this from the relative safety of my New York apartment. I have no idea what it is like to live in Nigeria and face death for my religious beliefs. But I do know this: the root of all religious violence is the claim of exclusivity, that your tradition has a monopoly on truth. If Peter Akinola, and all the other Anglican separatists in the world fear the Northern liberals because we have departed from this theology, one that invariably breeds violence, then we are well rid of one another. Well rid, indeed.

Mahdi Kazemi still in Danger

Friends, please head over to the Save Mahdi Kazemi website to find out what you can do to help save the life of this young, gay Iranian. Please. And please urge anyone you know in the UK (including Archbishops, MadPriests and Doormen!) to do the same.

Terry

Father Jake Does it Again

Please jump right over to Father Jake Stops the World to read about the latest hate crimes perpetrated by Akinola sympathizers in Nigeria against anyone associated with LGBT Christ followers. This one has all the lovely qualities of a Fred Phelps demonstration, Nigeria-style: earlier this month, during the funeral for the late sister of Davis Mac-Iyalla, Director of Changing Attitude Nigeria (CAN), the leader of the Port Harcourt members of CAN was taken out and beaten by a gang yelling anti-gay epithets while they slapped, punched, kicked and spat on him.